A Makcik-style manifesto to save Malaysia from inflation, misinformation and parental “dia tengah belajar coding” delusions.
AS Sabah gears up for its state election and politicians rush to fine-tune their manifestos – polishing promises, ironing slogans and practising smiles that say “I care about you, bah” – this Makcik decided it is only fair she draws up her own version too.
Not to compete with anyone (walaupun if I join, sure menang aura category), but because while Sabah is preparing to choose a direction for itself, the rest of Malaysia is also quietly drifting – like a boat that forgot to tie itself to the jetty.
So, while candidates over there refine their visions for the future, Makcik is here refining the visions for your kitchen, your wallet, your WiFi and your sanity. Because let’s be honest, sometimes the real crises are not in Parliament; they are in your house and school where incidents had happened just because children had tough times to figure out what is real and what is not.
If Sabah is setting its political compass, Malaysia as a whole may as well decide what kind of country we want it to be:
One built on common sense?
One where kids aren’t raised by tablets?
One where inflation isn’t explained away with shrug emojis? or
One where WhatsApp uncles can no longer terrorise the nation?
So, while manifestos are being drafted over in Sabah, here’s Makcik’s own – marinated, spiced and cooked long enough to sting, soothe and maybe even save us from burning the whole kitchen down.
Let’s begin.
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The ‘screen-time tax’ (aka parental ignorance levy)
If your kid’s been playing Roblox for 14 hours while you tell neighbours, “Dia tengah belajar coding”, boom – 5% tax on your WiFi bill.
Children today can construct Minecraft skyscrapers, run a TikTok account and buy Robux with surgical precision but cannot pronounce “Good Morning” without buffering. We need a policy that penalises digital neglect and rewards digital balance.
How about we introduce a “tax rebate for actual parenting”? Spend one hour talking to your child about feelings instead of “Fortnite” – RM10 off your Unifi bill. Parenting but incentivised – very Malaysian.
Bonus clause: anyone who says “games build creativity” while their child commits virtual homicide gets sent to compulsory parenting workshops. Makcik will supervise with rotan in hand – not to hit, but to emphasise her scolding with Olympic-level pointing.
Extra idea: mall screen-time officers. If your toddler is blasting Baby Shark on an iPad the size of Kota Kinabalu, you get a yellow card. Two yellow cards = parenting detention.
The ‘inflation reality check act’
Because nasi lemak shouldn’t require a bank loan. Every policymaker must live on RM100 a week:
No bodyguards;
No official cars;
No towkay datin discounts; and
No shortcut to VIP groceries.
Just you and Malaysian economics fighting for survival together. We hear, “the economy is strong!” but our wallets are quietly whispering Morse code: S…O…S…
Implementation rule: attach one minister to one experienced pasar aunty. Whatever she complains about while shopping – harga sayur, chicken sizes shrinking, petrol naik, ikan mahal – becomes the official inflation indicator. If she rolls her eyes at the minister, all policies freeze until further notice.
Bonus clause: whenever a minister says “global factors” while giving a vague wave of the hand, RM50 vanishes from their pocket and lands in a household that could really use it.
The ‘WiFi for wisdom’ initiative
We have MyDigital, MyGov, MySejahtera but where is MyCommonSense? Let’s create a national digital literacy curriculum because right now Malaysians are becoming part-time victims, full-time forwards machines.
Modules include:
How not to believe TikTok quacks;
Recognising a scam before it recognises you;
Why that WhatsApp forward from Uncle Ali is not breaking news; and
How to know when “DM for side income” means you are about to get scammed.
Rewards system: Earn Makcik points for every hour your child spends offline. Redeem them for bookstore vouchers, schoolbook discounts and free nasi lemak Fridays.
Parents who let their toddlers scroll YouTube until 2am get sent to digital rehab bootcamp – hosted by Makcik. Bring water, tissues and prepare for withdrawal symptoms.
Ministry of Common Sense (MOCS – pronounced Moks)
A brand-new ministry dedicated to stopping nonsense before it escapes into the wild.
This elite panel includes:
Five makciks with eyes sharper than gaharu knives;
Three uncles with arms permanently folded;
One aunty who mutters “Aiyoo!” every time a budget proposal appears.
Their role: filter out nonsense initiatives, including giving teenagers free VR headsets “for education”.
Official motto: “We test before you stress.”
Official dress code: Baju kurung with deep pockets for receipts from 1998.
The “empathy is a subject” programme.
Moral studies? Check.
Islamic studies? Check.
Civics? Check.
Empathy studies? Vanished faster than free parking in KL.
Teach children that:
stabbing someone is not a conflict-resolution strategy;
screaming online is not activism;
0 being kind is not optional.
Finland teaches patience and emotional regulation. Japan teaches teamwork and civic responsibility. Malaysia teaches creative problem-solving under extreme everyday stress.
Time to flip that nasi goreng.
Syllabus:
Week 1: How not to be a jerk online.
Week 3: Apologising without saying “but actually…”
Week 6: Why forwarding WhatsApp messages doesn’t make you a journalist
Week 9: How to lose gracefully without breaking furniture
Final exam: Comfort a crying friend without Googling “what to say when someone is sad”.
Bonus marks for helping your mother without dramatic sighing.
Makcik’s final verdict
While Sabah sharpens its political choices and candidates polish their manifestos, the rest of Malaysia should not just sit around waiting for magic.
We need policies grounded in common sense, humour and empathy – not more task forces that feel like rejected scenes from “The Fast and the Bureaucratic”.
So, dear policymakers – whether you are campaigning in Sabah or working in Putrajaya – stop stirring the pot without tasting the soup.
Because the rakyat are hungry, not for more slogans, but for sanity, compassion and leadership that finally tastes like it knows what it’s cooking.
Azura Abas is the associate editor of theSun. Comments: [email protected]
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