Online dating risks exposed as victims share how “love bombing” uses intense affection to manipulate emotions, control partners and form unhealthy ties.
PETALING JAYA: Online dating can feel magical at first, but for some, the rush of attention carries a darker side.
“Love bombing” uses excessive affection to manipulate emotions, creating false intimacy and control.
Trish, a young woman who experienced love bombing, recounted the intensity of attention.
“We met online, and after just one conversation, he became overly affectionate almost immediately. The constant compliments and sweet talk began on day one.
“At first, I rationalised it as just his personality, but it quickly felt forced and unnatural.
“It felt good. But over time, the intensity became overwhelming. He would react strongly to small, everyday things, turning them into emotional moments. What initially felt like care slowly crossed into intrusion and control.
“After days of excessive affection, he would withdraw completely and act indifferent.
“Within the first few days, he had already said ‘I love you’ and expected me to say it back, even in writing. The sudden switch between obsession and silence felt manipulative.”
Trish now approaches relationships with caution.
“I value calm, steady communication and believe emotional intimacy should develop naturally over time.
“Later, I discovered he was (interacting with) multiple women simultaneously, confirming that the affection was not genuine.
“To anyone experiencing love bombing, enjoy the compliments. But if attention feels rushed or overwhelming, pause and question it. Genuine care does not pressure you, it gives you space.“
Her experience mirrors stories shared on online communities.
Reddit users have recounted perpetrators using love bombing to achieve specific goals, from sexual encounters to controlling behaviour.
One user, Agreeable-Piccolo591, said: “Someone bombarded me with messages, accused me of cheating over small delays and kept me constantly online. It was exhausting and emotionally draining.”
Clip012 said: “Once they get what they want, whether it is sex or marriage, the bombing usually stops.
“No one can sustain constant intense affection. It is done for a purpose. The key is to set boundaries and stay true to yourself.”
Cultural_Passion3522 said: “My ex expected me to respond to his intense affection a certain way. When I did not, he (accused) me of not caring enough.”
