PETALING JAYA: Interracial couple Steven Kok and Sunita Selvaraju stand as a testament to the old saying “love knows no boundaries”, displaying the power of love and overcoming life’s challenges together.
Originally from Petaling Jaya in Selangor, the couple now resides in the United States.
They said their journey took a difficult turn when Steven, 50, was diagnosed with polycystic kidney disease (PKD) in 2007.
PKD is a condition in which clusters of cysts grow in the body, mainly in the kidneys. Over time, the cysts may cause the kidneys to enlarge and stop functioning.
Although the disease was manageable at first, by 2018, Steven’s kidney function had deteriorated to the point that he needed a transplant.
The waiting list for a kidney in the United States is long but Steven did not have to wait as Sunita, 48, stepped forward without hesitation to save her ailing husband.
“We have the same blood type and I just knew I had to do it. I did not want to see him get sicker. If you can save a loved one’s life, why would you not?” she asked.
After multiple tests, they were found to be a perfect match and on April 23, 2019, Sunita donated her left kidney to Steven.
Now, Steven leads a healthier life and the couple hopes to inspire others to consider organ donation.
Their love story, like many others, is a mix of bittersweet challenges as they persevered against negative perceptions while embracing their uniqueness.
“People are often surprised to see us as a couple because he is a Chinese man and I am an Indian woman. This is a rare mix,” she said.
Their love story began 34 years ago when they met at a church activity.
Steven said: “I thought she looked lovely and it was love at first sight for me. But my wife will tell a different story.”
Sunita was drawn to his friendly nature, intelligence and sense of humour.
“He was a good friend to me and my siblings,” she said.
Sunita attributes the support of their families as an important factor in their journey, recalling how her own mother had expressed concerns about how Steven’s family would react to and accept her, especially given her different appearance and darker skin tone.
“But my mother-in-law, to my surprise, said to my mom, ‘My son loves your daughter very much, so I love her too’. She stood as an exemplary woman, far ahead of her time to break all barriers and gave her blessing,” she added.
Having been married for 26 years now, they have fully embraced each other’s cultures in their everyday lives.
“We enjoy all foods and traditions. Our pantry has everything from Indian pickles to kimchi and tofu. One day it is Chinese food, the next it is Indian or Italian,” said Sunita, adding that their two children are proud of being both Chinese and Indian.
“My son has a Christian and Chinese name while my daughter has an Indian and Chinese name. It reflects both our cultures,” she said.
Despite having the support of their families, the couple has experienced their share of prejudices.
“A younger couple stared at us while we were eating in Pudu,” recalled Steven.
“A student from Hong Kong once told me he did not like Chinese people marrying someone with darker skin,” said Sunitha.
Steven said attitudes and perceptions towards interracial couples are slowly improving.
“I have seen more interracial marriages in my circle recently,” he said.
“Love should never be limited by race. What matters is how you care for each other, support each other and grow together,” Sunita said.
Steven and Sunita’s journey is marked by cultural acceptance, unwavering support and even a lifesaving organ donation, serving as a powerful testament to the strength of their bond.
