EVER felt trapped in a loop of negative thoughts and emotions, reliving the same painful experiences over and over again? Perhaps, a critical voice whispers in your ear, telling you stories of failure, inadequacy or victimhood.
In the face of these overwhelming narratives, it can feel impossible to break free and move forward, but what if you can rewrite your story?
What if you can change the narrative that is holding you back? This is the heart of narrative therapy, a therapeutic approach that empowers individuals to reclaim their lives by reshaping the stories they tell themselves and others.
Narrative therapy invites you to step back from your problems and view them as separate entities. It is like watching a movie of your life, where you are not the character but the director.
You gain the power to pause, rewind and even edit the scenes that no longer serve you. One of the most powerful tools in narrative therapy is externalisation.
This involves giving your problem a name, turning it into an external character, separate from your identity. Instead of saying “I am anxious”, you may say, “Anxiety is trying to control me”.
This subtle shift in language creates distance and helps you regain a sense of agency but does not stop there. Narrative therapy encourages you to explore alternative narratives.
By asking questions like, “When has anxiety not controlled you?” or “What are your strengths that help you resist anxiety?”, you begin to discover new possibilities and rewrite the story you tell about yourself.
You can harness this power even on your own. Here are some steps to try:
-> Mirror exercise: Stand before a mirror, address the problem by name and challenge its hold over you. Recount times you have overcome it and visualise a future where its influence is diminished.
-> Journalling: Write down your dominant narrative, then counter it with instances where it did not hold. Craft a new story that celebrates your resilience and aspirations.
-> Talk it out: Talk to a trusted friend, family member or even yourself (out loud or recorded). Hearing your story can provide new perspectives. While professional guidance is always beneficial, these do-it-yourself techniques offer a starting point for reclaiming your narrative.
Why does this work?
-> Externalisation: Creates distance between you and the problem, reducing its emotional grip.
-> Rewriting: Empowers you to focus on your strengths and resilience, rather than the problem.
-> Narration: Solidifies the new, positive narrative and helps integrate it into your identity.
Narrative therapy is particularly effective for individuals dealing with anxiety, depression, trauma or low self-esteem. It allows you to explore painful experiences, challenge negative beliefs and create new narratives that promote healing and resilience.
Remember, this is a do-it-yourself approach and it is not a substitute for professional help.
If you are feeling overwhelmed or unable to cope, reach out to a qualified therapist.
However, for those who are looking for a way to manage their emotions and regain control of their lives, narrative therapy can be a valuable resource.
By taking the time to rewrite your story, you can discover your inner strength and create a narrative that empowers you to live a more fulfilling and joyful life.
The writer is a certified mental health and awareness practitioner specialising in narcissistic abuse recovery. Comments: letters@thesundaily.com
