WE all have diverse sets of friends, some of whom we consider best friends, some from whom we seek counsel, and yet others who are simply travel companions. However, there is one sort of ‘buddy’ we should avoid, and that is a fake friend.
Have you ever had the gut sensation that you have a false buddy in your midst? It can be difficult to know for sure, and much more difficult to accept if you have a close relationship with this individual, or have been “friends” for a long time. Toxic friendships exist in the same way that people might find themselves in toxic love relationships.
Take a look at some of their key characteristics, and see whether somebody in your social circle represents any of them.
They are not there for you
This individual appears when it is advantageous to them, but when you genuinely require them, they vanish. They just happen to be busy every time you need them and are unable to make any promises. They will be difficult to get rid of because they will make you feel guilty, and make you feel like the worst person on the earth for not succumbing to them when they are all frail and miserable. In their opinion, being there for you and providing emotional support isn’t advantageous to them in any way. And if they do show some concern to you, it almost feels superficial and not genuine.
They make you feel bad about yourself
Sophisticated tricks in the form of teasing and backhanded compliments are just a few of the ways that fake friends can try to knock you down to make themselves feel good. A fake friend will not uplift you the way a real friend does. You may feel unsafe, taken advantage of, or judged. Sometimes it doesn’t have to be obvious, but you can certainly sense their judgment or objection.
They don’t celebrate your success
They will not be pleased for you, no matter how well you perform at work or how happy you are in your personal relationships. Fake friends will not celebrate your victories, accomplishments, and triumphs, but they may even disparage them. They may use your celebrations against you, putting you down or belittling you, saying things like “anyone could do that” or “it’s not that big of a deal to celebrate.” They don’t enjoy it when other people succeed in life since it draws attention to their own failings.
Some fake friends would even abandon someone with a better life than theirs because it is too difficult for them to confess it. They will not applaud you or cheer you on; instead, they will remain silent and withdraw from your life for a while. True friends stand by one other in the face of adversity and rejoice in each other’s victories. They are pleased with our accomplishments. False friends, on the other side, become irritated and jealous when you achieve something.
They are disrespectful
Subtle mocking, light-hearted assault, and even taunts and praises make you uneasy. Teasing may be entertaining at times, but not always. This behaviour may have a variety of psychological roots, but it does not make it any simpler to deal with them. Furthermore, because a fake friend is uninterested in your well-being, they are more likely to disregard your limits. Whether they are just rude to you or openly ignore your needs, this demonstrates that they do not genuinely care about you.
They spread rumours about you
If they have heard a tasty titbit of information, you can bet that everyone they know has heard it before the end of the day. They get a kick out of hearing and spreading rumours about other individuals. It’s something you hear all the time as they dump odd “facts” they’ve picked up along the way. And their impersonation as a buddy comes into play when they talk about you to other people. Of course, depending on how careful this individual is about who they talk about you to, this one may be more difficult to detect. They could utilise one of the few things they’ve learned from you throughout your chats as social currency to gain the attention and favour of others. Friendship, like any other relationship, is founded on trust. If you find a buddy spreading stories or falsehoods about you, or simply trash-talking in general, they are not your actual pals. And you don’t need them in the first place.
They have something to gain from you
One of the characteristics of a fake buddy is that they expect something from you. They take advantage of your friendship. It might be for social prestige, getting a job, or becoming friends with your pals – anything to benefit themselves. If you’ve demonstrated that you will come to this person’s aid whenever necessary, that’s the job they have assigned to you, someone they can rely on. They will appreciate you in the moment, but you will not hear from them again until something else arises that requires your assistance. Fake pals prey on you since they aren’t afraid of losing you. So, what’s the point of you being worried when he/she is not?
They don’t fight for you
True friends are similar to families. They support one other and boost each other up. However, if you befriend fake individuals, they will never speak out when you need them. If you and another individual are having a dispute, a fake friend will not stand up for you. They will not speak up for you and vouch for your character since doing so will cause them to be hated by people with whom you disagree. Instead, they will stand by and watch you struggle alone. Even if they get something from having you in their lives, it is not enough for them to act on your behalf. They would sooner lose you than side with you. Fake buddies will only be present as long as their image is not harmed or everyone adores them. They are incredibly diplomatic, and you are left to deal with any misunderstandings or wrong doings on your own.
Fake friendships do exist. The greatest thing you can do is trust your instincts and gut feelings. If this individual frequently makes you feel horrible, it’s not a friendship that’s benefiting you, and you shouldn’t continue to explore that type of connection. When you realise a friendship isn’t worth your time and effort, it’s up to you to walk away. It may seem tough, and you may even miss this buddy, despite the fact that you know they were lying to you. To protect yourself and maintain your happiness, you should prioritise your mental and emotional well-being.
