Justin Bieber admits ‘walking on eggshells’ a lot in early days of marriage with Hailey

Justin and Hailey Bieber seemed like the perfect match without issues. However, their relationship together was actually shaky in the beginning. It wasn’t exactly a honeymoon period after getting married too.

In an interview with GQ, Bieber admitted that he was walking “on eggshells” a lot. He was feeling a little lost regarding his career path and his own happiness.

“There was a sense of still yearning for more,“ he said.

“It was like I had all this success and it was still like: ‘I’m still sad, and I’m still in pain. And I still have these unresolved issues.’ And I thought all the success was going to make everything good.”

“I just lost control of my vision for my career,“ Bieber explained.

“There’s all these opinions. And in this industry, you’ve got people that unfortunately prey on people’s insecurities and use that to their benefit. And so when that happens, obviously that makes you angry. And then you’re this young angry person who had these big dreams, and then the world just jades you and makes you into this person that you don’t want to be. And then you wake up one day and your relationships are f----- up and you’re unhappy and you have all this success in the world, but you’re just like: Well, what is this worth if I’m still feeling empty inside?”

To numb his feelings, he turned to drugs to get through. His dependence on drugs got so bad that his security guards would sneak into his bedroom in the middle of the night to check his pulse to make sure he was still alive.

“The first year of marriage was really tough because there was a lot, going back to the trauma stuff. There was just lack of trust,“ Bieber said.

“There was all these things that you don’t want to admit to the person that you’re with, because it’s scary. You don’t want to scare them off by saying, ‘I’m scared.’”

Fortunately, Hailey stood by his side and played an important role in realigning his focus. Bieber also put his faith in God during his trying times and it helped him set boundaries in his life. As such, he doesn’t work past certain hours now and keeps a routine.

“It’s just rewarding to be all that you were designed to be,“ he said. “And I believe that, at this point in my life, I’m right where I’m supposed to be, doing what I believe that God wants me to do. And there’s nothing more fulfilling.”

He’s now in a better relationship with Hailey. They do eventually want children together but just not at this time.

“We’re just creating these moments for us as a couple, as a family, that we’re building these memories,“ he said. “And it’s beautiful that we have that to look forward to. Before, I didn’t have that to look forward to in my life. My home life was unstable. I didn’t have a significant other. I didn’t have someone to love. I didn’t have someone to pour into. But now I have that.”